Finally, we are getting the props we deserve….and at the Emmys no less!!
Go check out the Amazon page for the “Victorio Kitchen Products Banana Slicer” and make sure you scroll down to the comments. They are a hoot!
Some of the best:
“I tried the banana slicer and found it unacceptable. As shown in the picture, the slices are curved from left to right. All of my bananas are bent the other way.”
“Once I figured out I had to peel the banana before using – it works much better. Ordering one for my nephew who’s in the air force in California. He’s been using an old slinky to slice his banana’s. He should really enjoy this product!”
“I have served in the US Army for over 12 years. I can say that there is technology being used by the military that is rarely seen in the civilian sector. Once in a while, however, an amazing product is released by the DoD for civilian use. The 571B is one of those products. Although once called the M571B Tactical Banana Slicer (TBS)V1, they have declassified it for public use. I am glad to see this product on the market today but I will warn you now, this is a CIVILIAN model and not designed for field use!”
“Upon receiving the 571B Banana Slicer from my best friend, I can honestly say my life is complete now. Something has always been missing. Oh sure, the mellon-baller I got from my mom was something, as well as the grape peeler. But for the life of me, I could not figure out how to handle these bananas without saying, “Forget it, yogurt this morning it is” (if only they would make a yogurt seal-opener…). Now, I can’t stop eating bananas,which has actually caused problems in and of itself. But it is worth it to have such a strikingly pointless device in my gadget drawer. It brings joy where it was never needed, and happiness with each perfect banana shape. I honestly am enthralled to see what will come next, I hope it deals with those devilish strawberries and their many seeds. ”
A restaurant that had risen to fame,
Claimed fresh squeezed lemonade made its name.
The prep cook bled the lemon of all its juice,
His hands forcing the lemon to turn it loose.
He squeezed the lemon and would not stop,
Until it was dry of every drop.
He threw out a challenge to anyone,
If they could squeeze out a drop, when he was done,
A hundred bucks to the one, who could squeeze a drop
Of the juice of the lemon when he would stop.
For years customers took the lemon test
But always failed, though they did their best.
Then a tiny bespectacled man stopped in.
In a voice pitched high, he said with a grin,
“I’ll take the challenge if you agree.
I’ll win and then collect– you’ll see!”
He took the lemon and squeezed, hands dainty and small.
They all watched with interest for the drops to fall.
The prep cook smiled certain failure he knew,
Then one drop fell and the momentum grew.
A puddle began to form on the counter-top.
Then with one last squeeze, he was ready to stop.
The prep cook asked, “What do you do with hands so strong,
What kind of work and for how long?”
They plied him with questions and continued to guess:
Then he told them he worked for the IRS.
Poetry by Pat Mullins/August 2001
Story taken from God’s Little Devotional Book For the workplace
Honor Books, Tulsa, Oklahoma
I did a quick poll around the Loggins & Associates office, and our favorites are Snickers (the top with three votes), Almond Joy, Kit-Kat, Butterfinger, Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, and Smarties…the good stuff. But, I’m pretty sure that Ben would frown on us taking payment in chocolate!
A very cute blog post from Forbes by Kelly Phillips Erb:
I love Halloween. I do. I love the camp, the excess, the whole over the top vibe.I dress up every year. I make my kids’ costumes for our school parade. I bake ridiculous amounts of cupcakes and make silly snacks that are meant to look gross like hotdogs that look like bloody toes in bandages and biscuits in the shape of bones. My kids go trick or treating with their godparents and friends. And then we invite the whole neighborhood over for a potluck. It is quite possibly the best night of the year.
What I don’t love is the ton of candy left over at the end of all of it. I live in a city of 1.5 million people. My neighborhood has 40,000 residents. That’s a lot of Hershey bars and candy corn. Even narrowing our trick or treat radius to a couple of blocks yields a lot of candy. And every year, I struggle with what to do with all of it.
So being the tax geek that I am, I’ve compiled a list of ten uses for leftover Halloween candy, together with a summary of the non-tax and tax consequences:
1. Give the good stuff to your favorite tax professional out of the kindness of your heart.
Non-tax consequences: You win undying gratitude of your tax professional so long as you pony up the Reeses cups and KitKats and don’t try to sneak in a Mary Jane or a Now and Later.
Tax consequences: None, really. It’s a gift. And unless you make a habit of giving your tax professional large gifts in excess of the annual gift tax exclusion (currently $13,000), you’re fine. Note that I’m not necessarily discouraging this behavior. (more…)